Monday, November 21, 2011
Maybe what mummy said just now was right...i used to be able to push myself alot more. i used to be able to force myself to focus better. I used to be really hungry for good grades. ok..its not like i'm not desperate and hungry for good grades, but i think i just dun have enough mental strength. i'm just not strong enough to push myself. i keep giving myself excuses, but at the end of the day, my parents and others are just gonna focus on the results and judge me. I guess thats how realistic the world is today. good grades = smart and capable. lousy grades = stupid and not so capable. bleahhh...i want to prove myself. i need to prove myself..but idk where has my mental strength went to.
maybe what someone special said was right...i cannot keep relying on my "feel" to want to do things. i must just do it even if there is no feel if not i'll never get anything done. o wells...i got to start pushing myself more. arghhh...