Sunday, October 24, 2010
i tried to compromise....since u wanted me home more often, i haven't even gone out with the girls even once...i dun even eat with them after trainings now...u know how this feels? it sucks...cos...i'm really drifting damn far away from them already...and there's nth i can do about it...this feeling really sucks..and i dun like it at all...yes, i see them all the time during trainings but i want to have at least that bit of social life as well...you shld know by now that i'll always put my studies first...if i have assignments or projects to do, i'll get it done...if i have to do my tutorials or study for tests, i'll get home earlier to do it and study...not like u duno the amt of effort i've been putting in ever since i went back...yea even though i din get straight As for my exams...but at least i managed to maintain my gpa...haiz...this feeling really really sucks...to not know what will happen once i trigger that plug..
i'm afraid of what will happen if i miss mass on race weekend..haiz...i'll feel bad..but...idk wat will happen...
these thoughts and feelings are really driving me crazy la....haiz...idk what else to say because nth i say will change anything....actually i really duno if ur against the sport or against my team mates...haiz ='(