Sunday, January 21, 2007
ok..i've been good,juz tinking about some stuffs recently. i've been rather busy with skool work...loads of hw..(actually not say alot la..but still...haha..)..ok..i shall blog about some of my thoughts.
hmm..have i been to busy with my skool stuffs that i've neglected my friends? have i been neglecting my family? have i been neglecting my commitments in church? etc...hmm..i used to talk to trudy on the phone on like saturdays and all..but ever since i've started skool this year..we began to talk less..in church, when i go for meetings..i come on the dot(on time) and leave almost immediately after meeting ends. I'm not the usual germaine this year. i usally stay and talk to others after meeting or i juz slack in church..but now......i feel im not myself anymore..
have i lost my old self?..am i really that busy?..do i not have time even to spend in church with my friends?..sigh..i tink i've really lost the old me...is that supposed to be good?...can someone tell me?!?!?!...hmm..i tink i've also been neglecting my family..sigh..(im so naughty)..hmm..its juz tat i dun spend much time at the dinner table with my family..i rush through dinner and rush off to my room till at night to do my hw..hmm..so its like i seldom talk to my parents and sister nowadays...hmm..
hmm..i really need to find back the old me...the germaine that spends time with her friends, family and does not neglects her responsibitites in church..i NEED to find back the old me !!!!!!!!! i really need to ...i tink my life now is boring..
on friday, one of my teachers read a morning reflection and one sentence struck me..it goes, " today was the tomorrow we were worrying about yesterday. was it worth it?"
hmm..i dunno if its worth worrying for the next day...i really dunno..its like everyday i worry tat i'll have alot of hw the next day and all..but seriously?is it worth it?..i mean got planned everything that is going to happen..its like he's the director/scriptwriter of our lives and we are the actors. therefore, i dun tink its worth worrying for the next day. wat is meant to happen will happen..i guess i muz learn to leave everything to God to take care of ..i muz learn to let go of all my unneccersary fears and worries. i will try to..hmm..i find the sentence very meaningful as at that point of time i was worrying alot about what's going to happen..o wells..
on that note, i feel that if i worry less about things i would be happier.. today during meeting a sentence in the reading struck me it goes something like, " when i was a child, i thought like a child" its like when i was younger i was happier because i did not complicate things. i tot of everything simply...now, even a simple thing seems so complicated and it makes me stress out if tings are always so complicated. as i grew older, i become more mature and began thinking alot more, but not the way a child does. i wish i could tink like a child in certain matters.. sigh..o wells
ok...i shall stop here....ahhhhhhh..i need to find back my old self !!!! where's the germaine i used to be?!?!?..someone please tell me..=) pls tag ppl..tks