Tuesday, July 18, 2006
i realized tat these few days i've been tinking of alot of stuffs...hmm...i feel tat sometimes when u really need ur friends to be there...they are not there for u ....i mean this is like for me is my good friends lor...hmm..ok..i tink its juz me being too stress lor...hmm..nowadays there's lots of skool work to do and all..and i tink im not spending enough time with my family and my friends...hmm...i tink tat maybe its juz the time in life where one has to make a decision on how he/she needs to piroritize one's time lor..i mean o's are like next year and its not a very long time to go ..cos time passes very quickly...take for example this year..its like wat so fast july liao..i mean not long ago...i was juz starting sec 3..and time flies lor...hmm..sometimes i juz wonder...after living 14 plus years of my life...wat have i achieved..?...wat have i learnt..?...sometimes i really wonder...hmm...
hmm..i realized tat nowadays im rather impatient at times la...hmm..its the stress i guess..hm.i mean for my friends and i ...i noe tat we are like always rushing to do our hw...study for tests and exams and we dun even have time to relax..and we end up sleeping late at night and all so ya...hmm..i realized tat certain tings i go through..really puts my friendship with some ppl to the test lor..hmm..i mean when everyone is so stress and test or exams are coming..and there is alot of tension..we tend to loose our temper at each other and all lor...hmm..i tink i muz really learn to treausure wat i have...cos u dunno when u are going to loose it..may it be a friend or watsoever ....hmm...i tink i muz really learn to appreciate wat i have now lor and like stop complaining..hmm..ok...
hmm..lets take for example..today at skool my grp suppose to present the chi skit lor...and ya..my grp was the first grp..tks to me (sry ppl)..cos draw lots mah so ya..hmm..ok..then there was some miscommunication and all so ya..then after the whole thing the usual thing is for ppl to say...y u do this when u not suppose to and all tat stuffs lor..and i sort of lost my temper at isa(sry jie...i din mean to)...and ya..so i feel like when im stress i take things too seriously and all...hmm...
hmm..ok..i realized tat these days i've been quite confused over a certain matter (jes will noe wat i mean)..but still..hmm..i really dunno..i really want to make a decision lor..but its so hard to make one...watever decision i choose..there will be a lot of hurt caused and all lor...hmm..i really dunno..hmm..ok..anyway..i feel tat im not a good junior to my seniors neither am i a good senior to my juniors..u see..sometimes i juz feel very useless cos i dun meet the expectations of my seniors and ya..i dun wanna dissappoint them although they always say its ok and all la..but ...ok nvm..hmm..as for my juniors..i dunno why they are looking up to me and all lor..i mean i feel really bad cos im not a good role model for them...hmm..o wells..i guess i shld not be so pessimistic...but the thing is i realized im becoming more pessimistic...hmm...i really hope things will get better lor...hmm..
hmm..ok common test and end of year exams are coming..im getting really worried..cause im not prepared for common test and its next week..omg!!! where did all ym time mangaement go to...?..where did all my motivation go to?..hmm..i juz im juz not focused and all so ya..hmm..i guess its all my fault tat i dun plan and manage my time well lor...hmm...i really feel very useless at times...i mean im not even able to make a proper decision..im not even able to state my stand firmly..where has all my confidence gone to?...sobs la..hmm...
hmm..i really want to talk to someone about it...but i dunno who ..i mean not all of u will understand..hmm..ok..nvm
hmm..ok..here is a question for all of u all...i really hope tat u all will ans this truthfully...am i really a nice friend to have or am i juz being irritaing if i want certain things to go my way and all?..ok and last of all..i would like u all to describe me in one word..its ok if its negative watsoever...hmm..tks ppl...
hmm..anyone want to study with me?... i need company to study..haha..
ok..i shall stop here for now... ppl please tag..my blog is so dead...tks
to veron and melissa:
hey ..to the both of u ..tks for being such nice juniors...and tks for helping me out in junior lectors..i tink i tell u all this liao..but ...ok..anyway..erm..i dun tink i can help u all with junior lectors liao..sry ya..cos im rather busy and all so ya..i dun tink i can cope..erm..but i have confidence in u ppl tat u all will con'd to do ur job during meetings and all..i noe tat u all will be able to do a good job..so ya..erm..if there is anything u need help with..u can still come and ask me though..tks ppl...
to isa:
sry i was impatient with u today...i hope u are not angry liao..hmm..sry ya..i tink tat i muz really learnt to control my emotions lor...erm..regarding the skit..i tink its ok la..no one is to be blame cause all of us were not prepared...hmm..take care...
to daryl:
i'll always remember u...u are forever in my life...i really care about u...